The Tiny Pig Universe

The Tiny Pig Universe

Stanley, Hammykins

in alternate universe

Yum-Yum is there too

In an alternate universe I am crazy rich, and possibly just crazy. Instead of tiny dogs as accessories, I have tiny pigs: Stanley, Hammykins, and Yum-Yum. I also have a golden tamarin named Little Lord Fauntleroy that eats the raisins out of my Raisin Bran so I can have just Bran. I dress him in a blue velvet blazer and bow tie. I have a suitcase full of scorpions at the ready for those that displease me. The suitcase comes with a set of tongs so I may whip the scorpions at offenders with ease. I still have hamster hands and Medusa hair, but my feet actually work in high heels, and I have teeth that are so pretty that Regis Philbin weeps at the sight of them. I have hired a small man in pajamas to bring me my gin and tonics; I pay him in comic books and oranges. What? I can do what I want, this is my universe.